Is it just me that is bored of turning on the news at the moment and hearing about climate change, the money problems everyone has, and the increased risk of everyone being killed by a nuclear bomb from Iran? Of course, you only hear that after you hear all about Jade Goody, and her funeral, which I’m sure I’ll mention in another blog, sometime.
I’m one of these people who do not believe that climate change is a myth, and I think it is happening, but I also think it’s not caused by us. I’m sure people who are quite good with their world history will know that this tends to be a cycle that ‘Mother Earth’ has. Just like most women, one day she’ll moan she’s cold, then so many millions of years later, will complain it’s too hot. You can’t really go longer than a week (if that), without hearing that the ice caps are melting, a species of fish has died or that we’re having ‘freak’ whether.
Whenever it snows now, it seems to be caused by global warming, but you go up to an old person, and they will tell you happy all about the snow in their days, when it was so cold, they couldn’t even ride their bike to school because it was frozen. Or they would be delighted to inform of when they had a big drought one summer. It’s something that been around for a long time, and not something caused by driving a Land Rover or by having a bath. Also, if we decide we’re all going to drive everywhere in Peugeot 107’s and take showers, it isn’t going to stop global warming.
Another thing I’m sure you would have heard about is the money troubles a few people seem to be having over the past year or so, caused by a banker giving a couple of people mortgages they couldn’t afford in America. Well, maybe on a larger scale than that, but still the point stands.
I’m one of these people who do not believe that climate change is a myth, and I think it is happening, but I also think it’s not caused by us. I’m sure people who are quite good with their world history will know that this tends to be a cycle that ‘Mother Earth’ has. Just like most women, one day she’ll moan she’s cold, then so many millions of years later, will complain it’s too hot. You can’t really go longer than a week (if that), without hearing that the ice caps are melting, a species of fish has died or that we’re having ‘freak’ whether.
Whenever it snows now, it seems to be caused by global warming, but you go up to an old person, and they will tell you happy all about the snow in their days, when it was so cold, they couldn’t even ride their bike to school because it was frozen. Or they would be delighted to inform of when they had a big drought one summer. It’s something that been around for a long time, and not something caused by driving a Land Rover or by having a bath. Also, if we decide we’re all going to drive everywhere in Peugeot 107’s and take showers, it isn’t going to stop global warming.
Another thing I’m sure you would have heard about is the money troubles a few people seem to be having over the past year or so, caused by a banker giving a couple of people mortgages they couldn’t afford in America. Well, maybe on a larger scale than that, but still the point stands.
People are not going to Spain in the summer, and instead have to go to the Lake District. I have no sympathy for those people as I am someone who hasn’t had the pleasure of leaving good old Blighty. People are not buying bottled water from the Scottish Highlands and have realised that water comes out of things called ‘Taps’. I don’t think the Credit Crunch is a bad thing really. People have managed to have a look at the money they waste on stuff they don’t need, and everyone’s learning how to count down from 5, as the interest rates tumble.
There are bad things to this of course, as people are losing their jobs, which then means more people are stuck at home watching telly and using electricity, which is apparently causing global warming which now gets us into a continuous loop. With the loss of coastline, we won’t need so many coastguards which means more jobs lost.
Another bad thing, of course, is that bank managers will now have to go bankrupt, as they won’t be receiving a bonus this year, which means they can’t afford their fancy yachts, big cars and houses that come with their own village.
So, as well as the world heating up causing ‘freak’ snow storms and bad credit, crunching giant holes in people wallets, we move onto the world governments scaremongering us into believing that anyone carrying a rucksack, wearing a turban and looking at ceilings in building, supposedly searching for cameras, is a terrorist which will kill EVERYONE! Either that or they’re a Muslim tourist in the Sistine chapel. In that case, maybe they are a terrorist, as I don’t think you find many Muslims in there, and if you do meet one in there, then I would be quite suspicious of them.
Anyway, the latest news is that Britain is apparently a ‘hot spot’ for terrorist to target, and attack us with their chemical, biological, radiological and nuclear and explosive plots to KILL US ALL! We also now have to report everyone who looks or act suspiciously, which if you think about it, is a great majority of people in Great Britain.
Also, I think we’re going to be disappointed next time al Qaida strike, because if they go for a suicide bomber again, all this hype would have been for nothing, so we now have great expectations for them to fulfil. And there is no point in hijacking a plane again, because pilots seem quite capable of crashing their own planes these days, without their help.
I don’t like that we’re being made to be fearful of everything. Once upon a time, the Wolf went to extreme lengths to see what was in Little Red Ridding Hoods basket, but now he has to call the Bomb Disposal Unit, just in case. I also don’t like the fact that we can’t walk into Woolworths anymore to pass the time of day, just because some Americans couldn’t handle their money and gave it to anyone who wanted to buy a house. Another thing I don’t like is that I have to pay £2.90 to catch a bus, which will apparently save the lives of my none-existent grandchildren and because I favour baths to showers, I am seen as an offspring of Satan.
But then again, there aren’t many things I do like, apart from milk, hugs, friends, and Sloths.
So anyway, that’s it, and I hope I haven’t scared you so much that you’ll need to sleep with a nightlight on tonight, because that will make global warming much worse.
Toodles m’dearys.
There are bad things to this of course, as people are losing their jobs, which then means more people are stuck at home watching telly and using electricity, which is apparently causing global warming which now gets us into a continuous loop. With the loss of coastline, we won’t need so many coastguards which means more jobs lost.
Another bad thing, of course, is that bank managers will now have to go bankrupt, as they won’t be receiving a bonus this year, which means they can’t afford their fancy yachts, big cars and houses that come with their own village.
So, as well as the world heating up causing ‘freak’ snow storms and bad credit, crunching giant holes in people wallets, we move onto the world governments scaremongering us into believing that anyone carrying a rucksack, wearing a turban and looking at ceilings in building, supposedly searching for cameras, is a terrorist which will kill EVERYONE! Either that or they’re a Muslim tourist in the Sistine chapel. In that case, maybe they are a terrorist, as I don’t think you find many Muslims in there, and if you do meet one in there, then I would be quite suspicious of them.
Anyway, the latest news is that Britain is apparently a ‘hot spot’ for terrorist to target, and attack us with their chemical, biological, radiological and nuclear and explosive plots to KILL US ALL! We also now have to report everyone who looks or act suspiciously, which if you think about it, is a great majority of people in Great Britain.
Also, I think we’re going to be disappointed next time al Qaida strike, because if they go for a suicide bomber again, all this hype would have been for nothing, so we now have great expectations for them to fulfil. And there is no point in hijacking a plane again, because pilots seem quite capable of crashing their own planes these days, without their help.
I don’t like that we’re being made to be fearful of everything. Once upon a time, the Wolf went to extreme lengths to see what was in Little Red Ridding Hoods basket, but now he has to call the Bomb Disposal Unit, just in case. I also don’t like the fact that we can’t walk into Woolworths anymore to pass the time of day, just because some Americans couldn’t handle their money and gave it to anyone who wanted to buy a house. Another thing I don’t like is that I have to pay £2.90 to catch a bus, which will apparently save the lives of my none-existent grandchildren and because I favour baths to showers, I am seen as an offspring of Satan.
But then again, there aren’t many things I do like, apart from milk, hugs, friends, and Sloths.
So anyway, that’s it, and I hope I haven’t scared you so much that you’ll need to sleep with a nightlight on tonight, because that will make global warming much worse.
Toodles m’dearys.
xXXx
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