Light-Hearted Offence

The world is filled with morons, and should have a thousand nuclear bombs dropped on it, whilst lions and enraged monkeys rip the faces and limbs from every person who has ever uttered 'erm' in a sentence. In fact, every member of planet Earth should be taken and shot in front of our God for being the stupid, brain-dead twerps that they are. Full stop.

Are you offended by those comments? You should be. I just wrote something offense about a group of people which is nasty, vindictive and inciting hatred. Come on, sue me. Take me to court. Issue a statement saying that I should have all freedom of speech removed from my soul because I use it in a way in which you disagree with.

That is, in fact, an exaggeration; I purely just think that 'the world is filled with morons'. The rest is optional really. So, do you want to know why I am 100% sure that almost every member of human kind is a brain-dead, moronic twerp? Well, let me show you the Oxford Dictionary's 2009 definition of the word 'Comedy':

1 a film, play, or other intended to make people laugh. 2: a light-hearted play in which the characters find happiness after experiencing difficult situations.Synonyms: humour, fun, hilarity, funny side, laughs, jokes.

I could go into many more dictionary definitions, such as humour, amusing, humorist, funny, etc. Either way, it is generally considered that comedy is not to be taken as truth; as the person's actual honest opinion, however offensive it may be.

There have been many comic moments which have had the context of humour removed to make something seem simply shockingly offensive. One example is the Ross/Brand Sachsgate fiasco, in which they phoned up Manuel from Fawlty Towers to inform him that his granddaughter was a bit of a slut. Although he didn't find the funny side, Manuel was not too offended and shrugged it off. However, the 27,000 other people who were in no way involved, were somehow offended, and complained to everyone.

Most stuff which Frankie Boyle says has the comedy element removed and is taken as a blind insult, either at the Queen's vagina, Katie Price's disabled son or Kerry Katona. Personally, I don't find much that he says funny; but that is my OPINION, and therefore NOT FACT. Due to that, I know that those comments, put into context, were meant to be, in some twisted sense, comedy. As I result, I brushed them off, and forget about it without an ounce of offence consuming me.

I do seem to be one of the few people that seems able to distinguish between what is MY OPINION and what is considered to be FACT. Jeremy Clarkson's latest comments have been juggled around the Internet, television, newspapers and radio, as part of journalism reporting the offense which has ensued. Jeremy Clarkson stated on The One Show (BBC 1), that striking public sector workers should be "executed in front of their families". Not the nicest of things to say, I grant you, but it is glaringly obvious that he was presenting a very exaggerated view, which was more than likely for the purposes of trying to be funny.

Yes, Jeremy Clarkson is in trouble again for telling another bad joke.

Where ever the news has been reported, the comments have had all context removed from it. You can view the transcript of his comments here, on The Guardian website, and judge for yourselves. In the first 24 hours, barely 5,000 people had heard the comments and complained, and a majority of that was purely because a 15 second video of him saying those comments, with everything said before and after removed, was passed around the Internet. The BBC removed that particular episode of The One Show from iPlayer, so people could not watch it, and therefore the morons had no way of understanding the context.

Three days after the comments were made, the number of complaints had risen to over 21,000; only 6000 short of the amount received for Sachsgate. Now, maybe I'm being blind sighted, but surely if you've been SO offended by a comment, it wouldn't take you three days to complain. Therefore, I suspect that, just like Sachsgate, a majority of the people 'offended' by the comments, never actually saw the show live, and have, in fact been offended by BBC News repeating, and Twitter spreading, the 15 second clip. Surely, that is just as meaningful as me complaining about the treatment of disabled children in the 19th Century; a hundred years before I was born. If you were not offended at the time, and only after you have been told that something IS offensive, then the complaint should be answered by a gurgling, snot-nosed 6 month old who is sat with the phone in his mouth, for that is the amount attention and respect their complain deserves.

Similarly, Life's Too Short is coming under similar scrutiny, with it apparently being offensive to dwarfs, and therefore people are convinced that Ricky Gervais hates people who have dwarfism just like all other disabilities (people forget that it was co-written with Stephen Merchant). In fact, there is a campaign under way to get Life's Too Short taken off the telly. There was a whole interview with the campaign leader a few weeks back in The Guardian's 'g2' pullout. She has a young son with the disorder. I felt sorry for her until I realised that she too, is a moron.

'Substitute the word "dwarf" with that of another minority or disability' Kirstina Gray says, 'and the BBC would probably find itself in court'.

Why is it that every individual of this planet seems put upon by the comments of another human being? I personally don't think the BBC would find itself in court as it is comedy, and if it is offending, then get over it; it's not intentional (unless the comedian is Frankie Boyle, then chances are, he was purposefully trying to offend). In the 'Mockumentary', Warwick Davies plays himself as being a selfish prick. It's acting. The comedy is in no way pointing fun at his size, just merely using it to enhance the humour. The story line is based around that, just like there are films based around 40-year-old virgins.

If people from minorities or with disabilities, want to be treated as equals to the rest of the populace, then they have to be able to be subject to comedy, because that is what happens in most walks of life when everyone is equal. People make fun of others, and vice versa. I'm sure there are a majority of people in these 'categories' that can have fun; be subject to 'banter', and not get offended, but there are is a small selection of people, who are either so highly strung they could bungee jump, or are not properly informed, and think they should be offended. Those people ruin comedy, and life, for the rest of us. I refuse to live a world where people believe in political correctness.

As for Ricky Gervais using the word 'mong', and using it in its traditional sense before it became an insult for people with disabilities; it's no different to me saying 'I'm gay because I've finished my Uni essays'… It doesn't mean I'm going to have sex with another man in celebration.

And as for Jeremy Clarkson's other comment about people who commit suicide in front of trains being selfish; well it just so happens I have long held that same opinion. They cause disruption to hundreds of people, and there is usually a team of people that have to clean that person up, as well as the sadness that person causes the people they leave behind. A sad, tortured soul or not, it's still a pretty selfish act to commit… IN MY OPINION.

Also, just to redistribute a quote from Stephen Fry back in 2005:

'It's now very common to hear people say, "I'm rather offended by that", as if that gives them certain rights. It's no more than a whine. It has no meaning, it has no purpose, it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. "I'm offended by that." Well, so fucking what?'

And if you're offended by what I've said, either participate in a healthy, educated, well-written debate with me, or complain.