We all know of Gok Wan as a 'fashion expert'. Essentially, he can just tell what clothes and colours complement each other best, and the best colours and clothes are suitable for different woman. I can do that. I always walk down the street judging the clothes woman wear, and bitching about how tight they look, commenting on how they make someone look 5 months pregnant or just plainly having a sense of disgust for anyone wearing a jumpsuit or 'harem trousers'. If someone were to wear harem trousers over a jumpsuit, they would look like a Genie taking a break from attempting to change the oil filter on their car. Not the greatest of looks, I'm sure you will agree.
I think the arrogance that Gok Wan has about his 'talent' is actually very shocking, but that is the fault of thousands of under-confident women and the media, for making him seem like a God-like figure in the fashion World. He is not considered as a personal shopper, which is essentially what he is sometimes, but in fact someone who has the power to positively change a life. He is Channel 4's answer to Nick Knowles and D.I.Y S.O.S. Friends and relatives of a D.I.Y fashion victim will contact him, and he will look judgingly at them, during a montage of the person being miserable, depressed and fading into the background of a crowd of better dressed, happier people. We look at the 30-something, blonde, mother of three in jeans and a cardigan, and feel sympathy. Then, by the end, we have a montage of clips of the person looking happy and chipper, with her new hairstyle and brighter, make-up laden face, walking down the street, with a camera focus that specifically draws your eye to her, all because she is wearing a dress instead. 'She feels like a woman again', or some similar sound bite to the same effect, is played over the top. We are all happy for her, as well as being depressed that we wasted an hour of our life.
He has elements of a serial rapist/killer to him I think too, and it is all part of the process of making a woman 'more confident' and 'beautiful'. Personally, I think otherwise. He puts a female, in a large, white room, placing her in front of the only object in the room; a mirror. He then tells them to strip down to nothing, and they do it, because every woman does what Gok Wan tells them too. This is a woman who hates her body. He then tells them to stare at it. 'Go on, stare at yourself! Look at every wrinkle. Look at every flabby bit. Go on, shake it about a bit. Stare at your sagging cleavage, go on; STARE! Look at the veins in your legs. You think you're revolting, don't you?' He then stands behind the woman, pinching their flabby arms, and then breathing down their neck, sniggering, while he man handles their breasts, he whispers how 'fabulous' they are, in her ear. If he were to then offer them a suicide pill, most women would probably take it at that point. However, surprisingly, he doesn't rape and kill them. He tells them how they should show their body off more and be proud of it.
Gok Wan is the perfect person to advertise to woman, purely for that reason. If an advertising company is looking for someone to get women buying clothes from a high-street brand, he should do it. If an advertising company is looking for someone to get women to buy a particular brand of make-up or other beauty products, they should get him to do it. If an advertising company are looking to sell a particular make of vehicle, they should get him to do so, even if he does know sod all about cars. If an advertising agency wants to sell tin foil to women, they should get him to do so. Want to sell an acidic shampoo that will not only burn away the hair, but will also dissolve the scalp? He is their man. You could probably be advertising euthanasia of all women-folk, and if he done it, all women would happily march into the gas chambers to their death, with their purple skin and clothesline cover dress, happy because Gok Wan said they should.
Personally, I think he is either a complete genius and perverted man, or a very sincere and lovely person. Chances are, it's the latter, but let me just plant the seed of suspicion about him being a perverted genius, into your mind. Is it really beyond possibility that a man would pretend to be gay, just to be able to spend lots of time with lots of women, in order to see them naked and furiously grope their breasts whenever he sees fit? He has the power to make thousands of women wear low cut tops which show off inches of cleavage. How do you know he isn't high up in some London building, and with binoculars, watching them all walk past? Are you a woman who has ever been in London, wearing a low cut blouse, and heard a voice from afar shout 'Bangers!'? It could have been a straight Gok Wan, sitting with a tissue, watching YOU!
Just saying, how do we really know he is gay? Is it just because Wikipedia says so and he mentioned it in a self-centred documentary about being fat? Hmmm, how sure are you?
P.S. The scene from Monty Python's Life Of Brian, where everyone, ironically, states 'Yes, we're all individual' and 'Yes, we are all different', springs to mind...
No comments:
Post a Comment