March Madness

There have been plenty of slow news weeks. Even slow news months. The past month has probably been the complete opposite with so much happening, the news has struggled to fit it all in. Obviously we've had the Japanese Earthquake which has resulted in weeks of footage enforcing the destructive force left in its wake. We started a 'war' in Libya because it's been too long since we bombed another country which lots of oil. London has been hit by what are becoming trademark protests over money and lots of graffiti is used. There's been a double murder, with one victim being a woman who left a nightclub at 3am; a fact constantly told to us and repeatedly proved by CCTV footage. A 'Supermoon' loomed over the horizon for the first time in 11 years. The biggest news of all is that petrol is 1p cheaper, and thanks to that, I can afford a Mediterranean holiday!

Of course I can't afford a Mediterranean holiday. I haven't even got a passport...

I'm not going to jabber on about the Japanese Earthquake and subsequent disasters because I've already written in great length about that in my previous blog. However, I would just like to point one thing out to my local County Council. Three months after the cold weather, we still have roads smothered in bloody pot holes, and when they are finally repaired, they're done so poorly, that the road crumbles again as soon as a cyclist travels over it. The Japanese: Within a week of the tsunami, a road which was destroyed by its destructive force, was rebuilt and open. Shaming us Brits: It's the Japanese way...

In just a week!

There is one question which no-one really knows the answer to at the moment: Are we actually at war? The way I read it, the short and technical answer is probably no; not for now atleast. However, we are doing nothing to help international relations with Libya, and if you look at our current bombing habits, it's hard to not think we're at war. The English, American and French coalition are actually only enforcing a no-fly zone. This means, that no flights are currently, legally allowed to occur in the airspace above Libya. That’s simple enough. That just means we attack planes that break this rule in an attempt to keep civilians safe. Of course it's not that simple! America is involved. They seem to think that life is actually just a real game of Black Ops or some other war game with similarity. Just shoot anyone who has a vaguely coloured tone, just in case. "They're covered in dust? Better shoot just to be sure”.

An American plane came into difficulties and crashed near a village. The pilots parachuted safely. The locals welcomed the American's and even celebrated how they were helping their country. Then, during a mission to rescue said pilots by American troops, six villagers were shot and injured, including a young boy who lost a leg. An accident they call it. How does that even happen? America is just not happy unless they're shooting at people of a different race.

This does seem like this is going to end in much the same way as Iraq and Afghanistan; which is what people are worried about. We're forcing a country to abide by our rules. Sure, Gaddafi is a bit 'crazy'. I thought we were past the times when a leader would kill his country's citizens because they disagreed with him. Now, there is a debate about how involved we should become in this. Technically, it's illegal for us to give arms to the Libyan people to overthrow the Government. David Cameron still wants to do it though. However, we gave Afghanistan arms in the 90's, and look how that ended. This is a very complex issue which I know not enough about to be able to write more about before becoming inaccurate, boring and just writing gobbledegook.

Next issue on this month’s agenda: The London Protests.

London. It's such a wonderful, beautiful city. Apart from when a small selection of society decide to smash up shops, throw ammonia at policemen, vandalising historic monuments and just generally make profanities of themselves.

The March 2011 protests were about the recent budget cuts. 250,000 respectable citizens marched through the streets of London holding placards to make their point, whilst keeping within the law and having fun. The news repeatedly referred to it as a 'carnival atmosphere'. Then, a couple hundred people turned up disguised in balaclavas, and thought they would undermine the respectable citizens in their aim, by trashing London. As soon as the media found these events scattered across London, the media concentrated on them instead. Suddenly, the majority are forgotten once again.

Let me share a few figures. 66 people were injured; including 13 police. 214 protestors were arrested. That final figure is awful. I understand some of the anger by these protests, in that they attacked the shops, banks and hotels which avoid paying taxes in some shape or form. However, vandalising really isn't helping. Why does this always have to happen? We're a civilised community in this country, and a small percentage just wants to be violent.

Let's forget the protests that are 'fighting' for our future, and just concentrate on the main issue. Like everyone, I disapprove of the budget cuts, but I appreciate that it needs to be done, and maybe it could have been enforced slowly over a longer period, but let's just get over it, carry on with our lives and just be more conservative with our money. Could be worse; we could have just been hit by a huge earthquake and tsunami which killed thousands and destroyed life as we know it...

Labour seem somewhat hypocritical in all this however. I hear you cry 'But Stuart, politicians are never hypocritical. That word doesn't even appear in their dictionaries!" Yes dear reader, it's true. They're thinking about winning back more local council positions in the upcoming elections and are looking ahead to the future when they bid for power of the country again. They want people to like them again, and they're doing that by declaring that what Cameron and his followers are doing, is wrong. However, weren't Labour planning cuts nearly as bad? Yes, yes they were. They seem to have carefully forgotten that fact... Hmm.

Those have been the main points for March, but so much more has happened, and 2011 is proving to be such a busy year. However, I have limited knowledge, limited time and limited motivation to write a huge blog, decrying how awful life is becoming!

In April, we can looks forward to Easter Egg scoffing, a royal wedding and much more I expect...

WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!

I blame those pesky neutrinos. If you have seen the film '2012', you will know why. I only watched it very recently for the first time after buying it cheap in HMV. It is possibly one of the best disaster movies I have seen. I'll give you a quick synopsis in case you have not seen it. Essentially, neutrinos from a solar flare penetrate the Earth and warm up with Earth's core. (Already, the film has got the 'sciencey' bit wrong in that Neutrinos do not behave in that sort of way...). There are lots people running around and warning each other about the impending doom. The year 2012 arrives and lots on mini-quakes start to occur across the globe, and this causes cracks in the Earth's surface. The movie follows a family as they try to outrun the disaster, in which they drive through crumbling cities and fly around the World, getting help from people they meet along the way. They make it to China where the World's richest and most deserved get a pass onto one of numerous arks, along with every species of animal, in a modern-day adaption of the tale of Noah. By this point, you have to forget that millions of people have died in tsunamis, eruptions of super volcanoes, epic earthquakes and other natural disasters, so you can buy into the fact that everyone on these arks are happy that they are saved. The destruction of Earth stops as quickly as it started, and everyone moves to Africa. They probably live happily ever after. Finished.

The film 2012 is based around the idea of the Mayan's Calendar, which states that on the 21st of December, 2012, the World will come to an end. This, of course, is only a theory, but conspiracy theorists and movie directors find this a great idea to exploit. There is a possibility to this, albeit a slight one, in that our Sun's solar activity is going to intensify and let out huge solar flares as part of its 11 year cycle that coincidentally reaches its peak in 2012. These are not going to heat our World up to a point which we all fall into the Earth's core however. At worst, it will destroy our communication systems, and you know, to a stroppy teenager who can't text their mate down the road because of the inconvenience caused by the Sun, it may probably seem like the end of the world.

The film, although brilliant if you remove yourself from rational thought, is so far from possibility, it becomes laughable. Much like another apocalyptic movie, ‘The Day After Tomorrow', in that everything happens with such speed, if you were a deep sleeper, you'd miss the whole event.

However, maybe these laughable films are actually, slowly, becoming a reality. We're only three months into 2011 and already Australia has been flooded and hit by a hurricane, New Zealand has been rocked by an Earthquake and Japan has been almost destroyed by a horrific Earthquake which resulted in a huge tsunami and (at the time of writing) is about to be vaporised by a huge nuclear explosion, should you choose believe the news. The closer we get to 2012, should we expect an increase in even worse global events happening? The apocalypse is only one calendar away! Imagine the irony; just as the middle-eastern countries release themselves from the oppression of unfair Governments, they end up killed by a super volcano in the middle of Egypt. Also, why are we even bothered by increased tuition fees and a slashed NHS budget? We'd have all drowned in a freak tsunami from the Irish Sea by the time the effects really hit us. Damn you Neutrinos! Damn you!

In all seriousness (and those are three words you read rarely on this blog), the recent events in Japan are absolutely terrible. Seeing those initial pictures on the News on the 11th March, really depressed me. It scared me. It is horrifying. I just don't know what to say. A confirmed number of over 8,000 people have lost their lives, and another 13,000 are missing. The devastation is beyond imaginable, and I'm sure the true extent is impossible to try and convey on the news. However, still, the media 'flood' to this event like Cheetahs to a limping Zebra.

Every fifteen minutes for the first few days on 24 Hour News channels, we were shown the same videos, which involved aerial shots of huge tides sweeping away towns, cars floating about like plastic ducks and amateur footage of people running upstairs after spotting the water gushing into their homes. The media were keen to keep this story fresh, so they, as they always do, talked to irrelevant people who knew less than them. My favourite example is when a news presenter was talking to an English person in Japan through Skype. Great idea, but when the person lives the other side of the country, how is he supposed to know how people who have lost their homes and family, are coping?

Then each night a reporter would go and stand in front of a devastating scene to illustrate how bad this event was. This has ranged from standing in front of a ferry which was swept aground and now sitting atop a building, to a wrecked lorry mounted upon a pile of rubbish. I'm expecting the news reporters to become desperate and just start standing in front of a field of corpses, while he delivers his piece to camera with a deadpan expression on his face.

This is the tsunami the Japanese side of the North Pacific...

You really do have to admire the Japanese people though. If this event happened anywhere else in the World, the News channels would have hours of footage in which women do pieces to camera while sobbing uncontrollably, while others are behind them in the foetus position while screaming in a foreign language. I have seen no clips like that from the Japanese. They just seem to have accepted it and have resolved to carry on and sort out the aftermath as soon as possible. In fact, they seem to be more British than I. They really have taken the motto "Keep Calm and Carry On" to heart. For that, I think the Japanese are the strongest and most admirable race on our Earth.  I am proud to be of the same species as them. The Americans however, I am not. When news hit America that a big tide was on its way, they wept at the camera continuously, and prayed to God. All they got was a slightly bigger wave than normal. Yet still, they cried at the camera, telling us how scared this made them feel.

This is the 'tsunami' the American side of the North Pacific...

"Dear America, Grow some balls. Signed, Britain."

Mind you, we Brits are still guilty of finding misfortune at the misery of another nation. The past week has just been filled with people stating that Nuclear Power is unsafe and dangerous due to the recent danger caused by the Japanese Earthquake. On the contrary, I think this is a testament to how safe Nuclear Power is and how safe the systems put in place are. One of the most powerful Earthquakes in recent memory strikes not far from these sites, and then huge tidal waves swept through. This is the same Earthquake that made skyscrapers many miles away sway, and the same tsunami that swept many building from their foundations. Yet, for the most part, these buildings remained in tack.

The word 'meltdown' has been thrown across the media and Internet a lot of recent days, and this is a word which has the power to strike panic into one’s mind. It's one of those buzzwords that aren’t a used a lot, but when it is used: Woah, you better run away screaming! I'm not going to claim to know a great deal about Nuclear energy, but those explosions were caused by the formation of hydrogen gas when the cooling equipment failed to work and the hot rods and steam reacted with each other. Why did the cooling equipment not work? Damaged power supplies stopped them working. This isn't a demonstration of how dangerous nuclear power is; it's a demonstrating of how fragile our World is.

I, and I am sure a lot of other people paying attention to this story, have learnt a lot/had our memories refreshed about Nuclear Power. The news, although sometimes morally wrong, can be very informative when it needs to make the ignorant masses understand important news events. In your face Jamie's Dream School! Give us devastation and computer animations with things blowing up, in amongst some words from the periodic table and innuendos such as 'rods becoming hot', we, as a nation, are well away.

Anyway, my biggest of sympathies go to Japanese people, but, I'm sure they will rebuild their destroyed towns and communities to something much better than they previously had and put us to shame again. It's the Japanese way.

Jamie Oliver's Terrorist Recruitment Show

We've all been to school. Some of us have excelled and have surpassed all expectations. Others amongst us didn't do so well. The rest of us hit all the averages. Average students. These average students are hitting all the targets set by the Government. The average students don't get celebrated for their achievements and the average student doesn't disrupt a class and gain attention that way. The average student is the one the teacher cannot remember the name of. The average isn't known personally to the headmaster. The average student goes through their schooling career relatively unnoticed and doesn't complain about it. The average student is completely forgotten about.

I put myself in the category of an average student. I got a majority of my GCSE's to a C or B grade. I wasn't disruptive. My talents are not/have not been celebrated by my school in the 8 years I have been there. It took years for teachers to associate my face with my name in some cases. I'm not well known to my headmaster. I have spent the past 8 years in a high school where I have been completely overlooked, and guess what; I've not complained about it. I've just gotten on with it. I've watched people around me be praised for their extra-curriculum talents and achievements, while I've been completely forgotten and my talents unnoticed by the vast majority. I've also sat in a class while arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerps muck about and try their best to wind up the teacher up and therefore stopping 30 other students from gaining the education they deserve. They do this repeatedly, and repeatedly, and no punishment is awarded so the class continues to be disrupted.

Yet, it is those arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerps that have been given their own series on Channel Four called 'Jamie Oliver's Dream School'. This is so that Jamie Oliver can put his arm around them and tell them that the education system has failed them. As a reward for being an arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerp, they get educated by people who are widely respected in their subject fields. Possibly the greatest historian, David Starkey, aptly teaches them History. One of the greatest political minds [Citation Needed], Alistair Campbell, teaches them the ways of Politics. Simon Callow, one of the highly respected Shakespearean actors, teaches these arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerps the ways of Shakespeare. Robert Winston, a widely respected scientist, teaches them Science. Rankin, one of the greatest, currently active Photographers, teachers these bloody children Photography. There are so many examples of brilliant people teaching their subject field to children who I feel do not deserve these brilliant experiences. 

This is a fine example of the average student, the same students who have had their learning constantly disrupted by these arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerps, being overlooked and forgotten. I don't even think this selection of children have the word 'bashful' in their dictionaries. Our reward for doing well is a piece of paper. Their reward for failing is spending two months in the company of a selection of brilliant people, who they don't even know. Ironically, if they actually learnt anything at school, they might know who some of these people are!

The worst thing about all of this is that most of them don't even appreciate the experience of a lifetime which has been put in front of them! Most of them are treating it in exactly the same way as they treated their schooling career. Constantly talking, bickering, texting, dreaming, disrupting and just generally being profanities, and ruining this experience for those of them that do want to change their luck. The Government can't understand why people of our own countries turn to terrorism. I can understand exactly where they're coming from. Watching this show is enough to radicalise me into being a terrorist.

Is this show actually trying to raise awareness of our failing education system? No. Is this show actually trying to help these children improve on their skills so they do better at life? No. Is this show purely another way for Channel Four to entertain its audience rather than document and inform? No. How do I know that? Simple; the students they focus on mainly. They have 20 children. They focus mainly on about 3 or 4. These are the ones who shout and argue. Connor is the main one, and he is an 18 year old cockney who has no GCSE's. He speaks his mind and he takes no shit; not even from Starkey. Starkey called him fat. Connor retorted by pointing out Starkey's shortness. It was the greatest televised debate since Gordon Brown agreed to everything Nick Clegg said in last year’s disappointing election debates.

There's a girl called Angelique (but we can call her 'Angiie') and is from Essex. She has that grating, stereotypical voice, but credit where credit is due; she has the intelligence, willingness to do anything in a fun way, and will do anything to get her voice heard. If I had to pick a favourite, it'd be her. There are a couple of other ‘students’ who could have easily all been grown from the same foetus. I find it hard to distinguish between them, and they all spend an equal amount of time complaining about how hard done by they are. I can't really remember or name any others because they just blend into the background. Mind you, there's one that always sticks out for me, and that's Jamal, who I find looks like Prince and prances around like a young Louie Spence who's be told to 'try and act like a straight man?'

This pointless campaign belongs to Jamie Oliver, and he seems to be more of an arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerp than the arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerps masquerading as students who have been failed, rather than students who have failed. He is possibly one of the most hypocritical people you can find on TV (Ahead of him on that list are Nick Clegg and David Cameron). He walks around the 'school' constantly reassuring these teenagers that they are intelligent people brimming with humour, loveliness and potential and are overlooked by the schools who are only interested in getting averages than education. Then, he does pieces to camera and he talks to the expert teachers, constantly referring to the teenagers as 'feral'. He also continues to tell the selection of 'feral' children that he respects them. Call me old fashioned, but I always thought of respect as something to be earned. Now, the only things I can think they have done to earn his respect are to turn up to at the school and allow themselves to be filmed. He comes across as a two-faced profanity, and incidentally, he has a large tongue in both his faces. Jamie Oliver must have a foul-smelling, brown nose. Is he isn't rimming the students; he's licking the bowels of the experts he has got in to teach these 'feral' teenagers.

He even sits like an arrogant, disruptive, idiotic twerp...

Let us take David Starkey as a prime example. Regular viewers of Question Time will know that when he appears on the panel, you can expect heated debates in which his immense brain power makes even the best MP's look like tatty teddy bears with their stuffing pouring out of a seam between their legs. If he has an opinion, he will voice it, and he will stand his ground. So, 18 year old Connor was never going to be a match for him. Starkey made a comment about him being fat (and let's be honest, he is a bit) by saying "You're so fat, you can barely move". Connor responded "I guarantee you I can move faster than you old man. Look at your glasses man" and later added "You’re about 4ft tall. Have you always been that tall?" This resulted in everyone being a bit pissy at Starkey, and Starkey as a result having a bit of a diva attack.

Starkey refused to return to the show and real-life headmaster wanted him disciplined. A fair comment, but you can't discipline the teachers and not the students. That's sending them the wrong message. This 'Dream School' clearly has no ethos whatsoever. Anyway, Jamie was running between all the parties, telling them exactly what they wanted them to hear. How he can taste his food with the amount of shit he has up his nose as a result, is totally beyond me. However, Jamie and his two-faces work, and everyone shakes hands, makes up and Starkey even ended up called Connor 'sweet'. Aww.

Connor just before he blew...

This is possibly one of the most predictable shows on TV. We should know by now that Channel 4 does not make shows for an education purpose or to raise awareness for something. Anything and everything that they do is for entertainment. Bearing that in mind, it was obvious that these children would spend their entire time in front of a camera, playing up to it. They argue and shout. They drink and text. They ignore and chatter. They annoy and emotionally cripple a nation. It certainly is an interesting show, but it isn't doing anything for raising awareness of our education system. It does the complete opposite. I mean, I'm the same age as these teenagers, and the education system hasn't failed me. I'm pretty intelligent, and I was an average student who got no special treatment.

I somehow manage to throw together this blog. Not bad for someone with an English Education. Where's my respect Jamie!?