Thou Shall Not Share Thy Opinion

You have an opinion that you would like to express do you? Well, let us make some checks... Is it remotely racist? Can it be construed as sexist? Are you mocking religion? What about being homophobic? Could it be gingerist? How about insulting fat people or discriminating the disabled? Are you Fascist or Ageist? Is what you are saying stereotyping a group within society, like Gypsy's or Dwarfs or is it a joke about class? Are you promoting genocide or heightism? Does this comment hate on young people? Are you pointing fun at Goths etc? Could this be you thinking you're satirising politics? Is it judging people with a certain taste of music? Are you generalising people with certain jobs like estate agents or lawyers? Do you want to share findings which you have spent years researching and have conclusive proof for what you want to say? Are you just pointing out the bleeding obvious?

If it is any of the above, then I would keep quiet if I were you. I mean, we don't want to start a worldwide scandal here. Mind you, if you really have no choice and you have to express your opinion, then take the following advice: Stand your ground. Or, failing that, run away as soon as someone slightly disagrees with your opinion and apologise until you have completely worn away all twenty eight of your teeth and then resign from your job, no matter what it is. You're an I.T. Technician whole commented on a ginger person standing in the queue in front of you to your friend the next day? Resign! You’re an old lady who said to a tall black man “You’re very tall dear, aren’t you; and surprisingly nice...”? Well run away before he gets offended dammit! How dare you people try and carry out the basic human right of Freedom of Speech. You disgust me! Moving your tongue about like a free spirit; you Hippie! Oh no, now I've done it. I'll have to get a job and resign straight away to prove how deeply sorry I am for any offence I may caused to anyone, ever!

Shall we take a break from the sarcasm and calm down now?

In case you are yet to notice, this blog is trying to make sense of this new trend we have of complaining about someone's opinion and thus taking a metaphorical sledge hammer to Freedom of Speech after being deeply offended by something we heard someone might have said.

In recent weeks, television personalities have been at the front of this worldwide misunderstanding. The BBC had to apologise to China after an innocent joke, made on Qi a little while back, was completely misunderstood by the entire nation and taken as slanderous racism. The little bloke on Top Gear forced the BBC to apologise to Mexico after he called them all lazy and flatulent. Maybe he took it slightly too far in the end, but it was merely exaggerating on a stereotype, which doesn't translate well in other countries. The latter scandal infuriated everyone who didn't particularly care. Steve Coogan is one, as he ranted to The Daily Express about the trio’s casual racism and calling them bullies. Yes, you see, sharing your opinion is no longer considered to be decent honesty; it is now called 'bullying'.

Take another recent example: the sexism scandal of Sky Sport pundits, which resulted in Andy Gray being sacked and Richard Keys resigning. The entire thing was due to them merely expressing the opinion that a female football official would not be able to under the Off-Side Rule. It isn't even as if they said it publically on TV; the pair was just recorded off air saying it. Now, how many blokes do you think sat in pubs watching the game and said exactly the same thing? I wouldn't like to guess how many. I don't think that was a comment to be taken as gospel; I think it was just part of a blokey shenanigan. Mind you, Andy Gray did lose his case when it was revealed he asked a female to help 'tuck him in', but even that was just a bit of banter, and it was off air.

We are nearing a time when you might as well be sacked for thinking. This must be a scary time if you are one of those lunatics that constantly wears a tinfoil hat for fear that the CIA are reading your mind. If even a slightly racist thought crossed their brain waves for more than a nanosecond, they would constantly fear the risk of being prosecuted. Many times I have had the thought to kill people. Could I therefore be charged for Intention to kill or commit GBH? If I had a barely racist thought, that doesn't mean I'm going to don the KKK's white cape and start chasing black people does it!? The world needs to get a grasp of how ridiculous it is becoming in an attempt to remain politically correct at all times.

Twitter is making this even worse as well. Over a year ago, a man called Paul Chambers tweeted "FUCK! Robin Hood airport is closed. You've got a week and a bit to get your shit together otherwise I'm blowing the airport sky high!" That is very unlikely to have been a real threat. I mean, you don't see al-Qaeda making threats on social networking sites. That would ruin the point of them. This was clearly an attempt at humour by the accountant, albeit slightly ill-conceived. This man has been charged of 'sending a menacing electronic communication'. Utter ridiculousness!

Paul Chambers, the bastard who tried to have a sense of humour!

I'm currently a bit peeved at the NHS and how I have been untreated with my dental pain the past few months because of bureaucratic slowness, so if I should tweet: "FUCK! Kent and Canterbury Hospital are irritatingly slow. They have one week to get me an appointment or I'm blowing the hospital sky high!"* am I going to be prosecuted? I probably won't because there is no real menace behind it, and if I know that and you know that, then where is the threat? It's the same thing.

Another example of this is a Conservative councillor being arrested for comments he made on Twitter about a Journalist, saying she should 'be stoned to death'. This has led to the man losing his job as councillor. I think it is a scary thought that normal people can be convicted through comments made on social networking sites. The amount of times I've called Piers Morgan a cunt, or continuously ranted about Jade Goody and applauding her eventual death. I tweeted the other day that I wanted to punch a small child in the face because my toothache was getting unbearable; am I now at risk of being arrested? Well, I hope not. I tweeted a long time ago that I drove through a set of red lights (accidentally, I'm not a dickhead). I didn't get contacted by the DVLA, but why is that any different? That is an actual crime that I committed; not an empty threat about blowing an airport up.

Twitter is also the centre of other scandals, such as comedians pointing out the bleeding obvious to Keith Chegwin. A comedian pointed out to the ageing unfunny man that a lot of the jokes he tweeted were not actually his, and were in fact material by current comedians working the circuit, and he claiming it as his own material. Other comedians then backed up the claims which 'Cheggers' refused to admit to, and carried on tweeting the jokes of people like Milton Jones. It has resulted in a continuous debate on Twitter with many slanderous comments being passed about. All this just because someone noticed that Chegwin tweeted jokes of other people; and it was painfully obvious. It was a friendly comment which ensued into electronic carnage with various top Tweeters abandoning the social networking site.

I mean, both sides of the debate have fair points. Jokes are a comedian’s livelihood. You don't steal famous artworks and claim them as your own handiwork. However, can someone actually claim ownership of a joke? Someone put the words in the right order to cause laughter, but can they actually own it? That's the beauty of jokes; you can share them with the world, and they get passed around and changed.

We just live in silly times where people are easily offended. I don't know the Offside Rule in Football particularly well, but accuse me of not knowing it; I'm not going to get offended. You can call me overweight if you want, I'm not going to get offended. You can make fun of my race and nationality; I'm not going to get offended. You can call me ginger if you want, I won't get offended (Mind you, I'm not ginger, so I'd just be confused...). So the list could carry on. It's an opinion, not fact. You see, the fact seems to be that you have the freedom of speech, but just don't be moronic enough to actually practice your rights.

That is what happens when you let people read The Daily Mail. Their journalists and columnist regularly flex their outrage muscles and think up slanderous opinions about anyone and anything, link it up to some comment about immigration, and BAM! That person's opinion has been turned into fact just because Daily Mail readers are gullible enough to believe anything. Tell them that Princess Diana, The Nations Princess, was actually killed by a giant Octopus brandishing the Eiffel Tower as a weapon, who then got stuck in the tunnel, and was also under the awesome power of an asylum seeker with a vengeance, they'd probably believe you. The Daily Mail has ruined England, and is the source of a virus that is spreading worldwide, which allows people to be told when they are outraged. It's the next pandemic: Offendere Flu. How do we cure this? Well, I'm afraid morons are just going to have to be culled in their millions in a frantic bid to save the uninfected members of the Human Race.**

I have no conclusive end for this blog. I get annoyed by people being offended and big scandals being born from someone sharing their opinions with another, joking about, being misunderstood or just pointing out the bleeding obvious that everyone is also thinking. This needs to come to an end, but I don't actually see a way in which this can resolved. I think it's a scary moment to voice unappreciated opinions. Thank God no-one has heard from Jim Davidson for a while. What? He's making a comeback this year? Oh mercy!

*This is a joke. I am not going to blow up Kent and Canterbury Hospital, or any other hospital. This was an ill-conceived attempt at humour which I deeply regret and hope no-one has been inconvenienced by my comment. No malice was intended.

**This is a joke. When I said I wanted all moronic people culled, I was misquoted and I am deeply apologetic for any offence caused to the community of complete morons...

Bully Nick Griffin Time

'What's so special about Question Time this week?' a friend asked me and when I said because Nick Griffin from the BNP was on it, they replied with 'Oh, is he that racist guy everyone hates and calls Hitler?' which I think is a good way of summing him up really. Just as Question Time started on BBC 1, a storm was going over my house, and just as the title sequence started, a huge bolt of lightning went across the sky... Coincidence? Probably, but it could also mean God was rather pissed like a majority of people.

Was Question Time a fair and unbiased program? Of course it bloody wasn't, it's only the BBC. No it turned out to be a competition on who hates Nick Griffin more. Was it the audience who laughed at every point that could be taken as slightly hypocritical and sneered at reasonable responses? Was it Bonnie Greer the black female writer who sat next to him constantly asking what he defines as British? Was it Jack Straw who seemed surprised when he was asked a question about his cock-up in immigration? Maybe it was Baroness Warsi (the Conservative spokeswomen for community cohesion (whatever that is)) who hated every answer Nick Griffin gave? Or possibly it was Chris Huhne, a Liberal Democrat who just hated Nick Griffin purely because he lost out to Mr Griffin in the elections? It's hard to tell.
A huge majority of the show was purely people asking Nick Griffin questions and then calling him a blatant liar. Unsurprisingly, there were a lot of people from ethnic backgrounds in the audience and the camera would be quick to cut to one if they pulled a face which could be interpreted as disgust. Is Nick Griffin really racist though? And I think the answer is no, it's just all been taken way out of context by the media, and everytime he said this - guess what - He'd get laughed at and called a liar. Someone even called him 'Dick Griffin' which is such an original insult. I think that member of the audience came up with it all by himself - such a clever boy. To be honest, if this happened at school, it'd be classed as 'Bullying' and with them filming it, and metaphorically slapping him and laughing; it can also be classed as 'Happy Slapping'. Yes, David Dimbleby and his friends where happy slapping Nick Griffin on BBC 1, and on Friday, everyone seemed surprised that Nick Griffin was making a formal complaint to the BBC about the episode. He too (and rightly so) believed he was bullied on BBC 1 on Thursday evening.

I personally think Nick Griffin came across as a very professional politician, which is something not usually said about politicians. Through all the grief he got, in my opinion he coped with it very well and took it in a light-hearted way infront of the cameras. When asked what his view on Islam was, Mr Griffin gave an answer which is correct. He basically said that he disagreed with the opinions of Islam and certain things in the Qur'an, for example their treatment of women. Now, had that question been asked by a law student from Essex and answered exactly the same way by David Cameron, it would have been expectable; seeing as it was asked by a Muslim and directed at Nick Griffin, it wasn't seen as an unexpectable answer.

Anyway, eventually the subject changed to Jan Moir's article about Steven Gately. Every member of the panel all said that she had the right to say those things and The Daily Mail to print the article, so that was repeated 5 times. As you can guess, once the subject changed to homosexuals, Nick Griffin was dragged back into the centre for yet another bashing by the rest of panel and the audience.

I am intrigued by the voting system and freedom of speech at the moment. Members of the public voted for Nick Griffin, which meant he had made it so far up the metaphorical ladder of politics, that he now completed the entry requirements for Question Time, and the BBC where completely right to allow him to have an appearance on Question Time because of this. We're also constantly reminded that we have freedom of speech, so therefore why are people against him talking? It does seem that we're only allowed this basic human right as long as we don't offend anyone and the comment passing out of our lips if Politically Correct. If no-one likes him, then who voted for him? It is very much like John and Edward on X-Factor at the moment; no-one likes them, but someone keeps voting for them. Granted, that's the only time Griffin is going to be compared to two 18 year old lads, but I like uniqueness.

One thing which was constantly said, was that it was the 'BNP's Christmas come early' them appearing on Question Time. And it was, but not for the reasons in which they insinuated. It was more because the BNP have come across as more vulnerable during this bullying, and have therefore come across in a more positive light. Mr Griffin only lowered himself once in below-the-belt punches. A comment about his father fighting in the war, and Jack Straw's father being arrested for refusal to fight, in some way meant that Nick Griffin could not possibly be the love-child of Adolf Hitler.
This point has been proven, with a new poll out today. 1 in 7 people would back the BNP, all thanks to the episode. Now that's a real kick in the mouth for everyone who spent that hour 'Happy Slapping' him in hope of degrading him. Yet everyone is now raging about this; it seems no-one is going to own up to answering yes on this poll.

On Friday morning just as I walked out of the bathroom, the TV was on, and guess who was on GMTV... No it wasn't Nick Griffin, it was Chris Huhne. You remember him surely; I only just told he was a Liberal Democrat. Anyway, he was on there spreading his message of hatred and giving his view on how successful he felt the show was and how it made Nick Griffin and the BNP look. I don't know what he said because I was using the hair dryer while staring at the television, but it didn't look positive.

Just incase you are part of the huge majority who would 'happily pay for him to be deported to the Antarctic where everything is white' and find Nick Griffin 'repulsive' (they're quotes from Question Time, not from me) then here is a bit of material for you; What's with Nick Griffin's wafty eye? He could look at the audience and at David Dimbleby's neon green tie at the same time.
If that didn't please you, here is a link to a website where you can endless hours of repetitive fun.
http://www.slapnickgriffin.co.uk/

Personal Computers Gone Mad - Is It Politically Correct to say 'Gone Mad'?

You often hear of people saying “Oh, that’s political correctness gone mad I tells ya”, although has it really gone made, or is everyone just exaggerating it so that the word ‘black’ is now racist and making a joke about a disability or being gay, is met by the audience gasping in shock. Also, I think it’s quite easy to agree that the picture of a Golliwog I’ve put, demonstrates my point of political incorrectness ‘going mad’ so to speak.

Someone who is often on the receiving end of some form of ‘Political Correctness’ is Jade Goody, who made a passing comment on Big Brother, which offended the entire country and led to being called a ‘British Disgrace’ by the media. The comment wasn’t even that bad, and wasn’t really much different to what people sitting at home watching, might say carelessly. Then of course the media done a metaphorical U-turn and started to call her ‘The Nation’s Princess’ when she got cancer and died. Then it was politically incorrect apparently to say anything, which might possibly offend, about her. It got to the point on Twitter, where every time I said something about her, I got bombarded by angry people telling me to show respect. Jade Goody, for now, is the icon of ‘PC gone mad.’

If we travel back in time a few months, and we arrive at the start of the Ross/Brand fiasco with the prank calls, they were considered ‘Politically Incorrect.’ Apparently you’re not allowed to phone up the grandparent of a whore, and refer to her as a whore. Maybe I’ve exaggerated that a little, but the basics of the argument are still there. Political Correctness hasn’t gone mad, it’s just there are lots of grumpy people who sit watching the news, and as soon as they get offended by anything, they call up OFCOM.

‘Black’ isn’t offence. Black is an adjective, describing a very dark shade. In fact, how many black people do you see? You see people with darker skin, but never do you see someone walking down the street that has actual black skin – if you see what I mean. And as for making jokes about disabled people, gay people or gay, disabled people, why is that any different to someone making a joke about someone with ginger hair, or a politician?

And going back to racism – this ‘politically incorrect racism’ does seem to be part of our culture. When my Nan is talking about an Asian person, she doesn’t call them Asian, she refers to them as a ‘Darky’, but does that mean my Nan is racist? No, it just means she’s part of an older generation, who come from a different culture to now, and who didn’t live under fear of political incorrectness. There is nothing offensive about ‘Darky’.
When its Christmas time and the whole family are gathered, the culture has always been that someone sitting in the corner says something, which can be misconstrued as being racist. In my family, you usually find my Step-Sister is the one who makes them comments. She’ll regale us in tale which happened during the year which involves a Muslim neighbour, or some kid who can’t speak English at the Primary school she works at, which usually ends in one of two sentences. “If they want to live in our country, then they’ve got to learn to speak English” or “Why don’t they just go back to where they came from.” Yet, in no way do I think she is being racist in any shape or form, but merely expressing an opinion. Which, last time I checked, you’re still allowed to do. When someone moans about a building having to have disabled access, they’re allowed to do so as part of ‘Freedom of Speech’ which includes expressing your opinion, and not everyone is going to like it – but that doesn’t mean they have to sue that person and get £1Million in compensation because his feelings have been hurt.

Political Correctness hasn’t gone mad, and in fact, I don’t even think political correctness even exists, and was a creation by the media, to put fear into people every time they speak their mind, and make people turn around and check the coast is clear before telling their friend a joke, which, out of context, could possibly be taken the wrong way and considered ‘Politically Incorrect’ to say so.

Another strong opinion, put across by me, but hey. I hope no-one has read this and think me and my family are racist.
Toodles m’dearys.
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