An Unconventional Driving Test - Ye Second

Wednesday was the day of my second driving test and you (like I am) will be glad to hear that this will be the blog about me and my driving lessons/driving tests. Yes, I did pass my driving test. My theory is that only the best drivers pass second time. It is a relief that I have to no longer sit next to either my driving instructor or my dad whenever I want a drive. Now I can either drive by myself or with one of my friends sitting in the passenger seat. It makes a lovely change!
I could write about my driving lessons prior to my test, but I fear it would get very repetitive and boring, not only for me to type but for you to have to sit and read. The general gist of my 6 driving lessons after failing my first one and before passing my second is that I'd drive around the same old roads for an hour. Occasionally I would do a three point turn or reversing around a corner, maybe do a parallel, possibly reverse into a bay, or if my instructor felt like 'throwing caution to the wind' we would do an emergency stop.
I am not going to say that they were a waste of time, because I do believe that I am a better driver than I was 2 months ago thanks to the lessons, but it is a tad bit tedious paying a guy over £20 a week for the pleasure of driving his car for an hour and ending up in the same place he picked you up. It's like an indecisive person hiring a lazy taxi driver.

The Test
Well things started off well with me having the same instructor as last time - the one that failed me. Now, I liked him last time and I liked him this time still. He was quite a chatty guy who made for good banter. I think that suits me; driving while having a joke with the person next to me. I even told him that I loved him when he told me I passed and I hadn't even been drinking. It is not every day I tell older men that I love them.
I did have 5 minors during my test though. One was for not checking my mirrors before changing speed and another for not looking in my mirrors before indicating. The other three I gained while doing my two manoeuvres. One minor I gained while doing a three point turn as I just tapped the curb. The remaining two I gained within seconds of each other while doing a parallel park. I yet again tapped the curb, so to correct my error I moved forward without doing my blind spot check. Really, I wasn’t that bad though. All that means is that if I am about to do a manoeuvre, then don't walk on the pathment.

The overall driving during my test was pretty good I felt. I achieved the roundabouts well, stopped at the appropriate times, drove at the correct speeds and swerved to miss a majority of the potholes. I think I deserved that pass really, but then with the amount of money I've spent on driving lessons alone (I have worked out it comes to nearly £800) I think the system has received enough of my money. Anyone who thinks driving is a cheap hobby was clearly born before 1950 when driving lessons where only 'five shillings'. It will be cheaper now I've passed; unless the cost of petrol goes up, there is no danger of me spending more on petrol than I did on lessons weekly.
My first day of driving solo was quite fun I thought and it was quite adventurous; I done nearly 20 miles of driving and achieved it much quicker than it would have taken if I walked. There was so much traffic on the way to school, that despite my journey taking me down a dual carriageway, I failed to get to 50MPH before joining the back of a miles worth of traffic. Chris Moyles and his team saw me there safely though, and a journey which would take about 15 minutes with no traffic took over half hour. Then after school, I took a few friends home and yet again I was met with traffic and potholes. I am not an angry person, but I do suffer from slight road rage it has to be said. I don't know why, but something about being in a terracotta car makes me feel ''ard'. The way home was met with less traffic, but bigger potholes and also the traffic lights near my house not working. It is quite fun really.

There are many Facebook groups which share a similar opinion to me about potholes. 'I've Paid My Car Tax, Now Go Fix Some F***cking Potholes' and 'I'm Not Drunk, I've Avoiding Potholes' are both correct. The roads around Canterbury seem to have more the holes than there are craters on the moon, and I'm sure there are many places which are similar across the country, if not worse. Even when they do fix these potholes though, they don't do it properly. My car has enough dents in it already (none of which were caused by me, honest. It was the previous owner, I swear) so I don't want them to be added to.

At some point soon, I will need to do a Pass Plus course so that I will hopefully be able to get some money off of my driving insurance when it comes to renewing it in May. If they think I'm paying £1,800 again, then Churchill have another thing coming. Just because I have tesicles, a car and live in an area renowned for attacks on cars doesn't necessarily mean I'm any more of a liability. Then, while I was on the phone to them to change my insurance so I was classed as a guy with a Full License, they tried to con more money out of me. No, I don't want to increase my annual mileage nor upgrade my breakdown cover so you can have more of my money. That is after I was on hold for ten minutes while they played depressing music to me. Call centres must cancel out phone lines like 'The Samaritans'. Do you think you're too happy and in danger of smiling, then just spend 5 minutes waiting to be put through to an advisor, that should do it.

Anyway, thank-you to people who have already congratulated me, and to the people who haven't, I still love you because this means you have read my entire blog without pressing the giant X button on the top right-hand (or if you are a Mac user, the red bubble on the left-hand) corner of your screen. I wish for a long and safe driving career. Hopefully I've not just jinxed myself so I crash my car next week...

An Unconventional Driving Test - Ye First

Yesterday I had my Driving test. I may as well tell you now incase you don't know already - I failed. Bugger. Anywho, the snow means I have time to write a blog, so here I go. First I'll update you on the useless information of my four driving lessons prior to my test, and then vaguely inform you about my test. I am sorry I failed because it now means you've got to cope with a few more blogs about my lessons.

So Lesson 29. We're going back to the last week of school and the day it snowed hard and I had a driving lesson. Fortunately, my lesson finished about half hour before the snow came down. Was still cold though! The lesson consisted of me doing two, yes that is right, two three point turns, a parallel park, a reverse around a corner and a reverse into a parking bay. All were successful and was overall a good lesson.

Now let’s move to Christmas Eve for Lesson 30. This was cancelled. Then back on an hour later with a different car. This first meant going to the instructor’s house to meet his wife and very hairy dog to get into his new back-up black car (I was the first student to drive it). Anyway, it took some getting used to, but other than that it was a very good lesson I thought. Done a reverse around a corner into a parking bay (a two birds, one stone move), a parallel park, a three point turn then a reverse around a corner. It was an interesting way to 'celebrate' my 30th lesson.

Lesson 31 a week later and I was back in the old car - the first student to drive the old car since he got it repaired. It was raining very hard and didn't really do much driving. The majority of the lesson was going through the 'Show Me, Tell Me' questions for my test, as well as numerous emergency stops and also managed to fit in a three point turn.
Lesson 32 was the next day and it was still raining hard as well as my last lesson before the test. We done some more 'Show Me, Tell Me' and more emergency stops; I have to say - emergency stops are such fun! Anyway, I also did a reverse into a bay, a three point turn and a reverse around a corner.

THE TEST
Okay, so yes, I failed. I have prepared an excuse however: Snow. My driving test was on snow and ice which if I'm honest isn't exactly the best conditions for a driving test. I should be grateful it wasn't cancelled though I suppose. I actually did very well for a majority of the test. It didn't start very well with me attempting to open the bonnet at the bumper but my instructor was very nice and didn't think I was a complete idiot.
I had 9 minors (you're allowed a maximum of 15 to pass) and had 2 serious (you're allowed none). The two ‘serious’ mistakes where silly one which I've never done before, and both done in the last 5 minutes of my test. One was rolling back at traffic lights as I hadn't put my handbrake on and the other cutting someone up coming off a roundabout. The minors where mainly me not checking my mirrors regularly enough and getting the wrong gear going up hills. Very silly stuff.

I am very disappointed with it really knowing I could have easily passed it. However I have already booked my second driving test. Annoyingly I have to wait another two months though - 3rd March at 09:37. Wish me luck!

Going back to my vague discussion about the instructors cars; he has, let's say, unique license plates. His normal red car has 'POO' written in his licence plate number. The back-up car has 'PEE' written in the license plate number. Now picture the scene with both cars on the driveway. You could knock on his door and tell him "Someone's left a poo and a pee on your driveway." That entertained me for ages when I figured that out. How immature am I?

So, from now on my driving lessons will be fortnightly (because prices have gone up and I can no longer afford them weekly) so a new blog on my driving lessons will be posted just before my test on 3rd March.

This is my first blog post of the year so I suppose I should say:

Happy New Year!

It's Unconventionally Close Now

It's not long before my driving test now; in fact I have my test on the 6th January which is the equivalent of 3 more driving lessons - it's becoming a scary thought considering I can't get much practice in my own car in because of all this blooming snow and ice. Anywho, I've not blogged for a while about my driving lessons, and I have 6 lessons in which to boringly inform you about. I hope I past my test first time because I don't think I could bear the tedium of having to blog about more driving lessons...

Lesson 23 then, and it was what I consider to be a very good driving lesson which I enjoyed. The lesson was mainly through country roads and was of course - an unconventional driving lesson. How many people have a driving lesson where they come across a telegraph pole across the road? My Driving Instructor doing the right thing, phoned the police to inform them while I carried of driving which meant I ended doing 20 minutes driving on my own, which was good. Besides that, I did do a reverse around a corner, into a parking space, a parallel park and also a three point turn.

Lesson 24 wasn't as exciting as the previous lesson. Essentially, it was just a boring hour drive around Canterbury with lots of traffic; in which I done (as you can guess by now) a three point turn, parallel parking, reversing into a parking space and reversing around a corner.
Lesson 25 was the same, driving around boring Canterbury, in what seemed to be a huge circle. I done a three point turn, a parallel park, reversed around a corner and into two parking spaces. The first one took 4 attempts before I done it properly - why I do not know. The second I felt was a much harder space to reverse into and managed to do it quite successfully.

Lesson 26 and it went very well and again enjoyed the lesson. I done the usual three point turn, a parallel park and reversed around a corner. I made no mistakes. However, as is common in my driving lessons, all the brake lighting failed, so 10 minutes of my lesson was at the back of the car replacing the bulbs. It's good experience anyway. This happened a few months ago as well.
Lesson 27 followed in the car's record for being very reliable with me doing the lessons with an almost broken clutch. This meant I had to be very careful with it, and again is a good experience I suppose. I done a three point turn and reversed around a corner - which for some reason I couldn't do properly.

Lesson 28 was in the dark - my first lesson in the dark to be precise... Well, considering that fact, it went very well I thought. I didn't know how to use the car lights, so there may have been the odd time in which I was driving in the pitch black. I now know how to work them however. Despite the fact it was a night time lesson, I still had to do a parallel park which went well. Also, I had to do a three point turn, which ended up being a 5 point turn because I couldn't see and reversed around a corner which also didn't go particularly well because of the darkness. The thing is, in the dark it's hard to see where you're going - would you believe that?

I get on well with my driving instructor, and the reason for this is that we share a similar tendency to have big pointless rants about insignificant things. A man not indicating at a roundabout can result in him moaning for 10 minutes at how dangerous it can be. Also, he seems to have a different word every few weeks to call people. Usually it's child-friendly words such as 'Plank' or 'Twit' but his new word for the past few weeks is 'Pleb', which I think may be a slightly strong word to call someone who forgot to put a blinking light on. Never-the-less, he's alright.

The next blog about my driving I expect will be telling you about my remaining three lessons and then how my test went; whether I passed or failed. I am actually quite confident about it. The only things which I think will let me down are my observation and reversing into a parking bay. Those are the two things which I have the biggest problem with. Hopefully it won't affect me and I'll pass first time; purely because I can't afford to take my test again...

Nearly There - Unconventionally Of Course

Hello blog fans or people who have nothing better to do; here is a blog about my recent driving lessons. I've now started doing six lessons to a blog, so here is a hefty blog for you to read. Hopefully, I shouldn't have to do too many more blogs on this subject as I am nearing the end of lessons and taking the sprint to a driving test instead.

So, let’s start where we left off - Lesson 17. The lesson started well, but it eventually went into disaster and my worst lesson ever. Disaster (maybe slightly exaggerated) started at traffic lights, waiting to go off onto a dual carriageway. As soon as the lights went green, a bloke with a caravan blocked the entrance and when he moved, the lights had gone red again. My instructor was not happy. Anywho, the dual carriageway took me to roads I've never been on ever; as a passenger nor a driver, and for 30 seconds I done absolutely nothing right. I didn't read the signs, so I didn't know immediately after the corner there was a roundabout. As I didn't know, I didn't slow down, thus panicked when I got there and went way too fast the wrong way around the roundabout and took the wrong turning. There was no-one on the roundabout at the time so there was no accident. Anyway, confidence took a bit of a shock but went on to do a three-point turn, reversing around a corner and parallel parking.

Lesson 18 wasn't as exciting. It was meant to be in the dark, but due to him getting a puncture, got changed to the next morning - in daylight. Nothing went drastically wrong, done the usual reversing around a corner, a three-point turn and a parallel park. With it being a Friday morning, there was rather a lot of traffic about, so a lot of the lesson was at 5MPH. Good practice though.

Lesson 19 was again around Canterbury, and was again in lots of traffic. I made one major mistake, when I drove past my Grandad in his car; I paid more attention to him than where I was driving. Luckily no-one died as a result though. This won't come as much as a surprise to you, but I done a three-point turn, reversing around a corner and parallel park. There was one surprise though, which was slightly disturbing. When waiting at traffic lights, a woman walked across the road and my instructor commented on how sexy she looked. It did distract me slightly from the lights changing colour.

Lesson 20, and I'd love to tell you how well it went, but honestly - I don't remember any of it what so ever. I expect we done a three point turn, reversing around a corner and a parallel park. However, seeing as I don't remember it, we can conclude from that fact, the lesson went smoothly, with nothing extraordinary happening, there can't have been any big mistakes and no-one could've died as a result of my driving.

Now onto Lesson 21. It was just around Canterbury again making silly little mistakes and I am no longer making any big major mistakes. We did the usual reversing around a corner, parallel parking, three-point turning and reversing into a parking space. It was a morning and therefore lots of traffic as usual. I saw a train though! Had to stop at a crossing and a steam engine went past. Now that's something you don't usually see in Canterbury.

And Lesson 22, which went very well. We took the same route as was planned for Lesson 17 (the first one in this blog post) and seeing as I knew what was around the corner, I slowed down properly, went the right way around and also took the correct exit, so that done my confidence a lot of good. Infact, this lesson was my first lesson where nothing went wrong, and it was in the early evening and having to use light. Also, I did reversing around a corner, into a parking space, parallel parking and also a three-point turn unsurprisingly.

Thanks to me having a few good lessons in a row and nothing too silly going on, next week I shall be booking my driving test. Next week my instructor will tell me how to book it and then I shall come home and book a test. With any luck I could be driving by Christmas and I may have even taken my test by the next time I post a blog. Obviously, I'm not about to get really big headed and say I'm going to pass first time - that'd be absurd, but I am confident about it, so with luck I will pass.

One thing I need to stop doing is as we drive past girls, I tend to take my line of vision away from the road and towards the pathment, so this is something I need to stop myself doing so much. My instructor keeps commenting on this as well. I suppose it's one of the curses of being single - having wandering eyes...

ANYWHO, that's the end. Wish me luck for my test!